Written by Abel Rodriguez
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Wednesday, 27 February 2013

image for Jack "The Old Geezer" Nicholson, 75, Hits On Jennifer Lawrence 22
A photo of the M&Ms that Jennifer Lawrence slipped on at the Academy Awards Show. (Photo by Jack Nicholson).

HOLLYWOOD - In a backstage at the Oscars move that even surprised himself, Jack Nicholson, the 75-year-old actor, hit on 22-year-old Jennifer Lawrence who had just won the Oscar for Best Actress for her role in Silver Linings Playbook.

Jen was being interviewed by ABC's George Stephanopoulos when Nicholson interrupted his interview to tell Lawrence that he was glad that the horrible fall she took on her way to the stage did not hurt her.

Lawrence said that she slipped on some M&M's that the Academy Award Show host, Seth MacFarlane had dropped a few minutes before.

She told Jack that she had agreed not to sue McFarlane after he handed her $400 in cash backstage.

Nicholson told her that he was not flirting with her but said that she had the prettiest eyes, neck, smile, teeth, and bosom that he has ever seen and he has literally seen thousands.

Lawrence jokingly told him to get away because the smell of Ben Gay was starting to make her dizzy.

Stephanopoulos then reminded the number one Lakers fan that he is actually old enough to be Jennifer's great grandfather.

Jack shot George the bird and left.

SIDENOTE: As Jack was leaving, Jen told him that she does not like the Los Angeles Lakers and that her favorite NBA team is the Memphis Grizzlies.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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