Written by dutch
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Topics: mind control, Goofy

Saturday, 9 February 2013

image for Goofy is Disney's MK Ultra Mind Control Agent

It has been claimed that Goofy is the most complained about character at the Disney theme park. One Mother said, "He is just creepy. My little butter-ball wanted to have his picture taken with Goofy and he turned away and farted in my face.

Out-raged punters have all told versions of the same story. Goofy pretends to be a good-humoured 'goofy' canine but bears no resemblance to any breed of dog. He is a sinister, and menacing presence always scowling at children and bursting children's balloon and stealing their candy.

One mother said that she had seen Goofy loitering around the secret "Club 39" and sneaking up to Arnold Shwarzenegger and doing a Nazi salute. Another, lady who did not wish to be named said that she saw him man-handling Britney Spears and dragging her bald-headed out of a hair-dresser's saloon, "Britney was saying F*** off Goofy I am tired of having things plugged into my head." Later on Goofy was seen escorting Britney out of a tattooist parlour and she had a brand new inking of a monarch butterfly on her bald head.

Goofy has been seen driving around 'bad boy' Justin Bieber and forcing him to wear a pair of ridiculous Micky Mouse ears saying to him, "Remember son you are in the Micky Mouse Club and we're your dinner ticket. One word from the boss and you could be back busking in Toronto and selling the Big Issue. Remember son the slag-heap is around the corner and be illuminated!"

Other celebrities such as Miley Cyrus has said, "Goofy really is scary and he is a real sleaze-ball. He forced me to have mind-control I went in and I was all grungy and wearing black and when I came out and was all pink and pretty like a Disney Princess.

Sheldon Cooper has testified to the fearsomeness of Goofy and said, "He is the creation of crazy Nazi scientists and is able to brain wash the young and innocent; he is my greatest, "bete noir" and my worst nightmare.

Disney has denied there is anything creepy or subversive about Goofy and that he had refused to have his picture taken with obnoxious toddlers.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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