Written by DP Whitehead
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Tuesday, 5 February 2013

image for Richard III Looked A Bit Like Me Didn't He? Claims Tom Cruise
A Richard III

After the recent facial reconstruction of Richard III, commissioned after his body was retrieved from underneath a British parking lot, actor and Scientology poster boy, Tom Cruise, is adamant that the dead monarch, portrayed through the centuries as a murderous villain who butchered his way to power, is his dead ringer.

"I saw the photos this morning and it was like looking in a mirror" beamed the handsome star "I mean look at him, he looks like me, a very handsome chap indeed, if I say so myself. Which I do."

The likeness though should come as no surprise to Cruise, for during a recent visit to London he admitted that locals were very vociferous in highlighting his likeness to the King.

"While in London, some cockneys said I had a face like Richard the Third, in fact many Londoner's refer to me as a great Richard the Third. I love it!"

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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