Written by Ossurworld
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Wednesday, 9 January 2013

We have learned what Kevin Garnett said to Carmelo Anthony that Mr. Anthony contends should never be said from one man to another.

Melo, as he often is called in terms of endearment, found that Kevin Garnett had many unpleasant nicknames beyond Melo, or including it. These names may be worse than sticks and stones. They led to the breaking point for Anthony.

One leaked term has now been revealed: Garnett referred to Melo as Marshmallow. Worse yet, he apparently compared Melo to the famous leprechaun cereal, Lucky Charms, which features green flavored marshmallows.

This cereal has implications to the Celtics faithful.

Following this, KG said that Melo tasted like Honey Nut Cheerios, which are fighting words in the NBA.

In stinging rebuke, after watching Downton Abbey, Mr. Anthony told Garnett that he was too tall to be a footman for the aristocratic Crawley family. (This reference, though esoteric, apparently was a plot turning point on the popular PBS series this week).

Garnett allegedly countered by saying Melo must have missed his Breakfast of Champions that morning because he was playing like a man on a steady diet of Fruit Loops.

Cut to the quick, Melo then found himself befuddled when Garnett noted that the fight in Anthony was on a level of a Quaker Puffed Rice quisling.

Elbows flew like macaroni without the cheese when KG added salt to the sugar by claiming Carmelo was like caramel with a big zero added on.

Manliness came under attack finally when KG said that Anthony was a frosted flake that Tony the Tiger would never find "Grrrrrreat!"

Carmelo finally took umbrage over the "empty calories" crack that Garnett added with a flourish as the buzzer sounded to end the game.

The rest, as they say, is like eating soggy cornflakes.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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