Written by Ossurworld
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Saturday, 5 January 2013

Shaquille O'Neal apparently has deep rooted trepidation about his masculinity. He recently posted a humor cartoon on his website in which a man at a long line of urinals finds his space invaded when another man stops and uses the adjacent urinal, one shoulder length away.

O'Neal considers this a fighting situation, though he adds apologetically: "LMFAO," the last resort of discomfort.

Though he pretends to support gay rights, Shaq also refused to do an on-air fist-kiss with another man a few years ago because it thought it was too gay for his temperament.

Shaq is a big man, and a big celebrity. We are certain that anyone at a urinal that wants a peek out of curiosity can probably see Shaq's shortcomings from three or four urinals' distance.

Shaq is also able to enter a stall with a door and lock it if his sensibility and size worries prevent him from unzipping next to the decorative urinal cakes.

Of course, then we face the other problem with public restrooms: the hole in the partition so the party in the next stall can do some footwork and send a sexting message.

All in all, it's enough to make a man want to take some anti-diarrhetics before going out on the town.

Of course, Dr. Shaq may be pulling our leg with this cartoon and his overreaction. After all, he is a specialist in testing humorous situations on the public.

You can never fully trust a size queen who dresses up as his twin sister Shaquita for Halloween. Shaq now seems like someone whose masculinity falls off the physical cliff urinals on each side of his broad shoulders.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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