Written by Ossurworld
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Friday, 4 January 2013

Many have seen the bearded lady in the circus, but that may not hold a candle to seeing Rex Ryan with a tattoo on his bicep.

We are not quite at the level of Colin Kaepernick, with long passages of the Bible being flung like Elmer Gantry at the attendees in the revival tent.

Kaepernick comes across as the Hell's Angels version of the crystal cathedral parish. Rex Ryan's meager tattoo comes across as the glue-on version of the tough guys in the NFL who are branded like cattle.

Rex apparently had the people he loves most tattooed on his arm. They are, in no particular order, Mark Sanchez and his wife Michelle.

On the body of a young lithe player in a Jets jersey (wearing number six) is the head of the woman whose feet Rex adores.

We wonder what fantasy league star crops up in Rex's dreams. Is it his wife who turns into Mark Sanchez, or vice versa?

There are worse things in the NFL than having your coach in love with your star quarterback. One is having your head coach tattoo your star's jersey on his arm. To say it is unique may be an understatement.

Mark Sanchez may be the pinup dream of many, but he likely most appreciates that his head coach keeps him in his thoughts daily. It means no bench is too hard, and no media excoriation is too nasty when the love of your coach means you never have to worry about making the playoffs.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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