Written by Abel Rodriguez
Rating:

Share/Bookmark
Print this

Friday, 28 December 2012

image for Johnny Depp and Kristen Stewart To Star In the X-Rated Movie, The Landing Strip
Donkey Kong, one of the two donkeys that appears in the movie The Landing Strip. (Photo courtesy of Rico Chorizo).

HOLLYWOOD - TouchRock Films in association with G-Spot Pictures has just announced that production will soon begin on a new Johnny Depp - Kristen Stewart motion picture.

The erotically romantic movie titled The Landing Strip is based on the book by X-Rated novelist Desdemona Milkmuckle.

In the movie Depp will portray Dingo Saltbutter, a noted Tinsel Town producer and Kristen Stewart will star as Tempest Kippizio, a young, nubile, unemployed actress who arrives in Hollywood from Cricket Corner, New Hampshire.

Saltbutter is the last of the LaLaLand producers who still employ the use of the old casting couch, when it comes to young celebrity starlets in the 21 to 28 age range.

A very naive Miss Kippizio falls for the ploy and after showing the movie producer her astoundingly cute landing strip ends up getting the part, beating out 43 other actresses including Megan Fox and Emma Stone.

Saltbutter and Kippizio soon fall madly in love and at the producer's insistence they end up getting married down in Cabo San Lucas, Mexico.

The happy couple celebrate their May-December marriage by renting a pair of burros and traveling from Cabo San Lucas to the nearby village of Santa Maracas, a quaint, sun-drenched village with a population of 617 people which has produced three recent Miss Baja California Beauty Pageant winners.

SIDENOTE: The Landing Strip will be filmed in Smell-O-Vision® and will include a cameo appearance by Christina Aguilera as Big Begonia the featured pole dancer at Senor Sixto Sancho's Pole Dancing Cantina in Cabo San Lucas.

Make Abel Rodriguez's day - give this story five thumbs-up (there's no need to register, the thumbs are just down there!)

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

If you fancy trying your hand at comedy spoof news writing, click here to join!

Print this

More by this writer

View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story

Stop - Warning

The story you are trying to access may cause offense, may be in poor taste, or may contain subject matter of a graphic nature.

This story was written as a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

To confirm you have acknowledged this warning, and wish to continue to read the article, please click the following link.



Otherwise, please click here to go back to the home page.




Share/Bookmark

Mailing List

Get Spoof News in your email inbox!

Email:

What's 5 multiplied by 1?

4 18 7 5
75 readers are online right now!

Go to top