Written by David Grant
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Wednesday, 28 November 2012

image for Christopher Walken Voices Anger
Fake Messages - "It's Craazy,"

Christopher Walken poured out his heart yesterday as he told me that impersonators are ruining his life. In this The Spoof exclusive, we reveal the bad impression that impersonators have left on him.

He told me just how upsetting things have become recently.

He revealed, "Just to illustrate, the other day, I was listening to one of my own voice messages that reminded me to get some more dawg food. I was in the local store for an hour until I remembered - hey, I don't have a dawg - It's craazy!"

I asked him that apart from other people leaving him reminders in his own voice, what else was happening?

He confided, "No one believes it's me when I call them. I mean, I could be dying of a heart attack, but if I rang 911, all I would hear would be laughter."

I asked him what he thought about impressionists like Kevin Pollak and Jay Mohr.

"I count them as two of my closest friends." he said, and added, "I have to get Jay to ring my agent for me sometimes because he has the only voice she believes. Kevin helped me recently by driving me home when I was straanded."

"I too ... wish to ask you a question," he interjected, "Do you think it's funny that people mimic me all the time?"

He was pleased when I assured him that The Spoof takes a dim view of people mocking celebrities.

I finished the interview by suggesting that maybe a new law making vocal fraud illegal would help, and he replied, "That's a great idea ... WOW!"

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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