Written by Abel Rodriguez
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Wednesday, 21 November 2012

image for Dancing With The Stars: Kelly Monaco and Val Chmerkovskiy Deny The Baby Bump Rumors
Kelly and Val relaxing in Kelly's apartment in Marina Del Rey.

HOLLYWOOD - During the 14 seasons that Dancing With The Stars has been on the air there has never been a dance couple who have become closer than Val Chmerkovskiy and Kelly Monaco.

The very petite Kelly, who was named after the color; Kelly Green, stars in the soap opera General Hospital and was actually the very first winner of the original Dancing With The Stars.

She said that she wanted to return to the show to prove to herself that she still has it.

The svelte actress, nicknamed Itty Bitty, is 36-years-old, weighs 95 pounds, and her vital statistics are a very impressive 34D-21-31.

Her partner Val "Shirtless" Chmerkovskiy is only 26, and the two have not only bonded excellently on the dance floor but they are also alleged to be a couple (after hours).

Carolina Chipotle with Bedroom Pillow Talk recently interviewed the couple in Len "The Grouchy Grouch" Goodman's dressing room and reported that Kelly said that Val hung the moon and Val remarked that Kelly is the center of his universe.

Miss Chipotle asked Kelly and Val about the recent rumors that Kelly is expecting. Both rolled their eyes and said that there is no way that Kelly could be pregnant because they always make sure to use condoms.

Val quipped that he usually uses two just to be doubly sure.

Kelly mentioned that her and Val have so many things in common that it is unbelievable. When asked to elaborate, she grinned and said that for one thing they both love the Pancho Villa Super Sized Burritos at The Giggling Guacamole Restaurant in West Hollywood.

She went on to say that they both immensely enjoyed the movie Titanic and Val can actually recite all of the dialogue spoken by Leonardo DiCaprio as Jack Dawson and Kate Winslet as Rose DeWitt Bukater.

Monaco then started laughing and mentioned that they both are addicted to Lucky Charms Breakfast Cereal with 7 Up instead of milk.

SIDENOTE: Miss Chipotle divulged that while she was interviewing the happy couple they must have kissed at least 26 times. She said that the two are about as close as peanut butter and jelly in a sandwich.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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