Written by Backandtotheleft
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Topics: Celebrities, Bristol

Monday, 5 November 2012

A notorious Bristol conman has been targeting reality TV stars in a bid to fleece them of their hard "earned" cash. Among the stars targeted by Selva Carmichael (who, in all fairness to the guy, does sound like the financial advisor to Silvio Berlusconi) was former X-Factor hero Chico. You know, the one who did a video that Gary Glitter would have been proud of.

Chico said (in a exclusive Back and to the Left news interview) (well no-one else wanted to interview him and to be honest it took a little bit of persuading by his management to get us to):

"The man was relentless, he pursued me like oh so many women before him. But in my defence I didn't want to sleep with him. He wanted to get his hands on my list of contacts so he could exploit y celebrity friends."

Any "celebrity" who had given their contact to Chico needs to be exploited in our opinion. Who's he got in his "Little Black Book" Pudsey the Dog and Wagner? We can't imagine there is much to be gained by exploiting them. In the case of Pudsey his entire life is one of exploitation anyway so would he even notice?

Selva also managed to defraud a charity, which isn't really that much of a achievement as we see every year. When tossers swipe the Remembrance Day collection boxes.

Selva, who likes to be known as "The Silver Fox" was unavailable for comment last night as he was in the middle of high level talks with the Royal Family. They've been defrauding the British people for years by pretending their relevant and he wants to know their secrets.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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