Written by Ossurworld
Rating:

Share/Bookmark
Print this
Topics: Tom Brady

Monday, 10 September 2012

Not since Pinocchio had a big problem with his proboscis has there been such brouhaha over a QB's new rating: his nose for news.

Tom Brady himself has no idea if his nose is broken, but he is wearing a hefty-sized bandaid over the bridge where blood was seen trickling.

Bill Belichick, never one to give in to hyperbole, said that Tom's nose is "all right."

Whether this will put a damper on his modeling career, only time will tell.

This could be a bridge year for his telegenic looks. At 35 a disjointed nose could prove to be a pug impediment to cuteness.

Having taken a kneecap to the cartilage of his nose, Brady at first seemed to have trouble seeing beyond the misshapen appendage. He followed his nose to the sidelines.

A few fans could test the relative severity of Tom's injury by seeing if his nose was moist. He appeared to have no deviations in his septum in post-game interviews.

As usual, Tom did not smell as a QB, and we seriously believe he will not smell next week when he plays.

Any nasal flaring may be considered typical behavior of the Alpha Dog in a state of agitation. No rhinoplasty is foreseen as a result of rhinotilexomania.

Whether there will be enough swelling to make him look like Leslie Nielsen in Airplane, or even Jimmy Durante in anything, media watchers have staked out a spot to observe any nasal deformities.

Right now the worst-case scenario is that Tom Brady could turn into Marlon Brando. If he continues to win by a nose, the Patriot Nation will toot its horn.

Make Ossurworld's day - give this story five thumbs-up (there's no need to register, the thumbs are just down there!)

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

If you fancy trying your hand at comedy spoof news writing, click here to join!

Print this

More by this writer

View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story

Share/Bookmark

Mailing List

Get Spoof News in your email inbox!

Email:

What's 4 multiplied by 2?

3 18 5 8
74 readers are online right now!

Go to top