Written by Abel Rodriguez
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Saturday, 1 September 2012

image for George Clooney Tells Clint Eastwood Not To Quit His Day Job
A cowboy boot that Eastwood wore in "A Fistful of Dollars."

HOLLYWOOD HILLS - George Clooney said that he and his alluringly gorgeous girlfriend Stacy Keibler watched Clint Eastwood make his speech at the Republican National Convention in Tampa.

Clooney stated to Tittle Tattle Tonight that he and Stacy had never laughed so much. He then made it clear that they were not laughing because Clint was funny but that they were laughing because they actually felt sorry for the 82-year-old legendary icon making a silly goose out of himself.

George said that he was expecting to hear a buzzer, or a gong, or some kind of noise signifying that Eastwood's five minutes were up.

The star of the Italian spaghetti westerns kept on talking to an empty chair for what seemed like 55 minutes, but it was actually more like 13 minutes.

Mitt Romney was reportedly backstage asking his wife Ann what in the world was Clint trying to do, single handedly destroy his presidential chances or what?

Mrs. Romney suggested that Mitt get his vice-presidential running mate Paul Ryan to go out on stage and tell Eastwood that he had run out of time and to get off the stage so that Mitt would not end up starting his speech at 2 a.m. Eastern Standard Time.

But apparently Ryan had sensed something was rotten in Denmark and he had gone into hiding in one of the chair storage rooms.

Hundreds of pundits, GOP delegates, TV reporters, convention analysts, and political experts remarked that they felt sorry for Eastwood who appeared to have had two or nine beers too many.

Romney's spokesperson Cooter "Bubba" Ficklefarker told the media that Eastwood was just using Bob Newhart's old invisible man routine.

George Clooney texted Eastwood and told him not to quit his day job. He also remarked that he needs to spend about $45 or so on doing something about his atrociously hideous hairdo.

Clooney said that his hair looked like a cheap Halloween wig that kids use when they go Trick or Treating.

Keibler chimed in and said that she suggests that Eastwood look for a mirror every now and then so that he does not end up looking like he just let three adult cats walk all over his head.

In A Related Story. Clint has reportedly turned down an offer of $2 million to appear in a commercial for Jose Cuervo Tequila.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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