Written by Abel Rodriguez
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Tuesday, 24 July 2012

image for The Very Sexy Mariah Carey Joins American Idol
Mariah Carey reading a copy of the Ryan Seacrest book, "My 11 Seasons With American Idol."

MILWAUKEE - Mariah Carey performed before a standing room only crowd at The Beer Suds Stadium in the number one beer city in America, Milwaukee.

After the concert she sat down with Pico de Gallo of Tittle Tattle Tonight and chatted about her 15-month-old twins, Bippy and Bappy; her husband Nick "The Swizzle Stick" Cannon, host of America's Got Talent; Rush Limbaugh's anti-female comments; and American Idol.

Mariah announced to de Gallo that after about four weeks of negotiations, she will be replacing Jennifer Lopez as one of the judges on the granddaddy of all reality shows, American Idol.

Carey stated that she is not at liberty to reveal what her salary will be but added that when she told her hubby Nicky about it he actually did five somersaults, two back flips, and two minutes of the Argentine Tango, all while dressed in his birthday suit.

De Gallo asked Mariah what she plans on doing differently than her predecessor Jennifer Lopez. Carey smiled shyly and added that for one thing she will try not to cry as much as J.Lo did.

She then added that she will also not be using Spanish words like olé, bravo, The San Diego Padres, and guacamole.

In News From Libya. The tremendous Sahara Desert sandstorm that hit on Monday deposited sand in such far away places as The Philippines, Peru, and Pittsburgh.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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