Written by Abel Rodriguez
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Monday, 23 July 2012

image for Lindsay Lohan's New Perfume Is Now Available
Lohan's new perfume Eau Du Freckles is doing very well. (Photo courtesy of Bruno Tonioli).

LOS ANGELES - Lindsay Lohan has just completed shooting on the film Liz and Dick about Elizabeth Taylor and Richard Burton.

She is thrilled that she has received such nice praise for her portrayal of the woman who has been married 8 times.

Lindsay recently told Piers Morgan that she knows that she has acted very immature of late but that she has finally seen the light and she is going to do her best to stop drinking, carousing, speeding, and saying stupid things like her friend Paris Hilton does.

Lohan was recently named The World's Number One Actress by the Motion Picture Coalition Institute of Greenland.

She flew to Nuuk, Greenland to receive the award which also includes the deed to 100 acres just outside of Nuuk.

Lindsay said that she is thrilled to be a land owner and added that she will either plant okra or breed kangaroos.

She was asked by Margarita Mixx with The Tinsel Town Times Tribune if she currently has a love interest. She giggled and said that she doesn't at the moment but added that if she plays her cards right she may have a shot at becoming Amber Heard's new girlfriend, since she has just dumped Johnny Depp.

"LiLo" noted that she is also ecstatic that her brand new perfume called Eau Du Freckles has just been picked up for distribution in Greece, Guam, and the Gaza Strip.

In The World of Politics. Mitt Romney told a crowd in Hot Springs, Arkansas, that if he is elected president he will see about purchasing the Dominican Republic and using it for storage.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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