Written by Oleg the Tumor
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Tuesday, 19 June 2012

Los Angeles - There were a few tense moments at the recruiting station today as Ms. Alley attempted to enter, albeit sideways.

Things went a bit better after the door was removed, but not much.

Once she caught her breath, she announced, "I'm here to answer the call of life, liberty, and the recipe for a chocolate kiwi pasta chutney, a big order of fries and a booty shake! Don't you guys have free coffee at these kind of, you know… places?"

This time, the pointing epidemic claimed another victim.

They pointed to the door because it had to be removed again, so she could leave.

She was completely deflated, not that the scale noticed.

"So where is the nearest Pizza Hut? They have beer."

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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