Written by Dan Cun

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Topics: Charity, Bono

Tuesday, 12 June 2012

image for Man Ignored At Bar for 6 Minutes Has Benefit Concert Organized By Bono!
Yes, I have 10 houses!

A Utah man, dying of thirst after waiting over 6 minutes to get served a beer has received help from an unexpected source.

Greg Marshall, 28, was attempting to purchase a beer last Saturday night at his favorite bar "Sweet Larry's" unfortunately though, despite waving a $10 bill in the face of the girl behind the bar, who was plainly ignoring him because last week he had implied to another friend that she once gave another a friend oral sex in his car, was not getting served.

It was then that U2 front man Bono arrived and began digging a well for Greg.

"Bono appeared out of nowhere and said "fuck yees ahll, to be sure, to be sure, oil bild this cub a well and he can drink from oit!" said Greg.

And that is just what the singing superstar did.

"He went out back, grabbed a spade and began digging" explained Greg "He then said he would put on a concert for me and that no one should go thirsty.......no one!"

Bono, who has been criticized recently for being a greedy conman whose other charity, The ONE Campaign, received over $20,000,000 in donations last year to help fight extreme poverty and prevent disease in Africa, yet only paid out $76 in grants, yet paid over $15,000,000 in salaries and $4,000,000 in 1st class travel and hotels said "Oi may be a conniving pikey fraud who will line the pockets of me mates but I will not stand by and watch a man not get a beer just because his mate got a blow job from a bird down a back alley. To be sure, to be sure."

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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