Written by IainB
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Saturday, 9 June 2012

image for Angela Merkel named Men's Magazine's June's Sexiest woman
Natalia Pugachyova, one of the Eurovision Russian Grannies, was more likely to win FHM's sexiest woman for June

In a strange twist, THE magazine for blokes (not men, guys or boys, but blokes) has released its June Sexiest Women List and it is topped by German Chancellor, Angela Merkel.

"It's not who I would have chosen," said editor, Penelope Niss. "I'd have thought that British men would have gone for Rihanna, or Kim Kardashian. Hell, I'd have thought that Kerry Katona would have received more votes than Merkel."

However, in a phone vote, the bubble shaped German received more than fifty percent of all the votes.

"We had nearly twelve thousand votes in all," said Miss Niss. "It probably would have been more, but the vast majority of our readership struggle with using a telephone. We might do an internet vote next time, as they have no problem finding their way to our web site."

With just over six thousand votes, Merkel was streets ahead of her nearest competitor, Tulisa.

A quick survey of men buying in a popular high street newsagent, revealed that sixty percent of men were buying the magazine for a friend, thirty percent had thought that they'd picked up Top Gear magazine and twenty percent had never heard of Angela Merkle.

"We'd love to know who's been voting for the German hässliche Frau," said Penelope.

In business news, Angela Merkel has just bought a controlling stake in British Telecom.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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