Written by Skoob1999
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Thursday, 7 June 2012

image for Ms Verity Warbling-Trollblog To Join Skoob Entertainment News
Loopy Luigi Dolcelatte Hitting Safeways Last Week

The world's most widely read purveyor of entertainment and gossip news, Ms Verity Warbling-Trollblog, has announced that as of today, she is no longer employed by 'Huzzah For Hollywood!' magazine, having been successfully headhunted by Skoob Entertainment News supremo, Buffty Ginslinger in a multi million pound deal, with a contract binding her to SEN for the next five years.

Ms Warbling-Trollblog cut her journalistic teeth as a cub reporter on the provincial newspaper, The Burnley Express, before moving on to the Manchester Evening Blues, and a regular spot on Grenada TV's 'What's Appenin' magazine show.

From there, the bright lights of London beckoned, and she was taken on as a showbiz correspondent by Virgin Radio, even though she hadn't actually been a virgin for some considerable time prior to that. According to reports.

Ms Warbling-Trollblog then took over a six week spot on notorious Hollywood gossip magazine, 'Huzzah For Hollywood!' a billion pound operation originally founded by Clint Denton a one time East End grease monkey from Bethnal Green, who made his fortune in the adult movie business, and who later gained notoriety for his extravagant 'Slathering Parties' in the Hollywood Hills, which were also reportedly attended by prominent American gangsters, such as Porky Pete Porcetta, Big Paulie Primula, Lardy Sandro Pistazarsolez, and Loopy Luigi Dolcelatte (The Big Cheese.)

The initial six week slot was extended, as Denton realised that Warbling-Trollblog was netting his corporation a fortune, and he was proved correct, as Warbling-Trollblog took the fledgeling internet by storm, racking up a billion 'hits' in her first three years online.

In recent months though, Warbling-Trollblog appears to have become increasingly disillusioned with the Hollywood lifestyle, reportedly confiding privately to friends that she finds the celebrity merry go round shallow and depressing.

Skoob Entertainment News supremo, Buffty Ginslinger, however was reportedly 'delighted' to have his prestigious new acquisition on board the SEN steamroller.

"It's the most fantastic news!" Ginslinger announced, as he downed a large Gordons and puffed excitedly on a huge Cuban cigar. "Old Warbly-Bullfrog is just what SEN needs! She can't write for toffee, and she spouts the biggest load of old bollocks I've ever had the misfortune to read, but people devour her bloody offerings! They lap them up! I've seen housewives slathering in supermarkets, desperate to get their grubby little mitts on the latest copy of 'Huzzah For Hollywood!' magazine. It's a licence to print money!"

At which point, Ginslinger slumped face down over the table and lapsed into unconsciousness. His companions, three Vietnamese prostitutes, laughed uproariously, clapped their hands in delight, and rifled his pockets.

Ms Verity Trollblog is expected to commence working with SEN immediately.

More as we get it.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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