Cabinet minister Theresa May has been pleading poverty again and is using it as an excuse to sell her severely soiled knickers on the internet using the slogan, Theresa's Teasers.
In justification for her latest moneymaking venture she complains bitterly that the cost of keeping a certain undesirable alien and his wives and children, dwarfs her pittance of a salary. In truth the woman is just a typical politician, always on the lookout for some extra cash on the side.
Apparently the demand for the oversize garments is rather limited on this side of the pond. The main buyers are the Wall Street protesters using them as tents, hoping that the obnoxious odours emitted from them may help to keep the police at bay.
Your intrepid weeki-leeks reporter went under deep cover to report on her unusual activities, and guess what info we uncovered? This extra income is being filed under the "running a charitable organisation" to avoid income tax bills. Yet another loophole to be exploited by the unscrupulous.
Unlike old Rupert, we did not stoop to hacking her phone, even thought she deserves it. The info was obtained from her latest boyfriend down at the pub last night after being plied with cheap booze by our reporter, paid for out of his own pocket.