HOLLYWOOD HILLS - Jennifer Aniston was recently getting her hair trimmed and she told her hairdresser FuFi Fondue that she has been keeping up with the goings on in the Pitt-Jolie-Thornton carnival sideshow.
Aniston who was married to Pitt before the tuna-lipped woman (Jen's words) snatched him away from her in 2005, recently stated to Pico de Gallo of Tittle Tattle Tonight that she has always held a special place in her heart for Brad.
The actress who is known as America's sweetheart says that every single day since Jolie kidnapped him she has thought about their marriage and how Brad used to playfully tickle her two big toes as they sat in bed drinking shots of Margaritaville Tequila while watching reruns of Gilligan's Island.
Aniston also admitted that she was so in love with Brad that sometimes she would get up at 2 a.m., go to the kitchen, and make him a batch of his favorite meal; blueberry pancakes topped with bacon strips, M&M's, and chopped jalapeños.
Jennifer confided to Mr. de Gallo that unbeknownst to Angelina, Brad has sent her emails, text messages, and has even called her up all within the past month.
She even divulged the fact that Brad and her, who have both always been sensuously playful, have even engaged in some second degree sexting.
De Gallo informed Jennifer that it is his understanding that Angelina plans on having dinner with her ex-husband Billy Bob Thornton even though Brad has told her that he does not want her anywhere near that flaky fruit salad of a jerk.
Aniston's eyes got the size of ping pong balls at de Gallo's remark. "Really?" She asked smiling from ear-to-ear, "Vampira Jolie is actually going to go against Brad's wishes and have dinner with the zombie-looking, has-been, museum piece?"
De Gallo assured her that his highly placed, unnamed, reliable, inside source had said that he or she had heard it with his or her own ears.
Aniston stood up and did two cartwheels. She then did three back-to-back flips as she yelled out "Weeeeee!"
She went up to de Gallo and gave him a sports chest bump and told him to please, please, please, be sure and make it known that she (Aniston) has made it very clear that if Brad leaves Angelina that she will take him back in the snap of a finger.
"You got it cutey." de Gallo remarked.
And with that Jennifer told the Tittle Tattle Tonight reporter that he can call her anytime if he ever needs a story.
FOOTNOTE: Pico de Gallo has just published his first book on the lustfully lascivious ladies of Tinsel Town. It is entitled The Airbrushed Secrets of LaLaLand's Sexy, Sultry Starlets.