Written by anthonyrosania
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Monday, 20 February 2012

image for With FOX's Revival of 'Flintstones', Seth MacFarlane Set To Replace Alcoholism With Bitter Failure
Rare image from MacFarlane's first cartoon, "If I Fellate You, Will YouKill My Mommy?"' still the CW's

At the offices of second tier reality-show broadcaster FOX, ratings wins like 'From Rigor Mortis To Burial: The Whitney Houston Funeral' and longevity milestones like the 500th episode of 'The Simpsons' are paving the way to a revamped Sunday line up that they are calling 'Animation Retribution'.

And smack dab in the middle of that suck-circle? "The New Flintstones Hour," from the whiskey soaked mind of executive producer Seth MacFarlane.

"Losing the right to broadcast the NFL was not a setback, it was an opportunity," said a FOX spokesperson who clearly didn't believe what he/she was saying. "an opportunity to wring every last dime out of ideas what were old and tired 20 years ago. Yay, us!"

Fortunately for FOX, they have a tried and true method of replacing shite with comedy (and ad revenue) gold.

"Step one: pay Seth a bunch of money to create a new show," said FOX Chairman Peter Rice, the man who blew a billion dollars creating and then shitting the bed with Fox Atomic. "Step two: schedule it after 'Simpsons'. Lather, rinse repeat."

"I'm not gay!" MacFarlane added.

"One thing we can promise is that we will promote this ad nauseum until the premiere, use the pilot's ratings to dictate Ad prices, then ride that pony until people realize it is complete dreck," concluded Rice, who figures he only has to tread water at FOX's TV division another year to flesh out his resume.

"It worked for Action!, Andy Richter Controls the Universe, Babes, Back to You, Bakersfield P.D., Boys Will Be Boys, Brothers, Cracking Up, Do Not Disturb, Down the Shore, Free Ride, The George Carlin Show,The New Get Smart, Greg the Bunny, Grounded for Life, Happy Hour, Holding the Baby, Karen's Song, Luis, Method & Red, Normal, The Pitts, The Return of Jezebel James, Sons of Tucson, Stand By Your Man, That '80s Show, The Tick, Top of the Heap, True Colors, Undeclared, Vinnie & Bobby, Wanda at Large, Wild Oats, The Winner and Women in Prison, right?"

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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