Written by Skoob1999
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Saturday, 4 February 2012

image for Vegetarian Rage As Harry Styles Out Of One Direction Papped Eating Meat Pie In Dorking
"That's Disgusting!" - Simon Pallid. "Bollocks! It's Reet Grand Wi Gravy!" - Ken Mither

Vegetarians the length and breadth of the nation were up in arms following the publication of photographs clearly showing Harry out of One Direction tucking into a Tesco's minced beef and onion pie in Dorking.

High profile foodies blame Harry's splurge on the band having spent a week in health crazed LA, before returning home with a rampant craving for some proper English grub.

But the vegetarian lobby were furious. Simon Pallid, Executive Director of vegetarian group 'Only Sadistic Bastards Murder Cute Animals For Food' raged:

"What kind of message does this send out to the nation's youth?" he told a packed press conference. "That eating the body parts of dead animals is cool? It's just sick! And Harry Styles ought to be thoroughly ashamed of himself. I bet he's one of those deluded nutters who imagine that fish feel no pain because they don't squeal when they get hooked and yanked out of the water. It's disgusting!"

A spokesman for One Direction described Mr Pallid as 'misguided' and stated that Harry had no strong feelings either way about the meat issue, saying that Harry simply enjoys the occasional pie.

A strong message of support came from Yorkshire 'Chips n Gravy!' campaigner, Ken Mither, of Cleckhuddersfax. He sent an email to Harry expressing his full backing over Harry's choice of pie filling.

"Ah felt I owed it tert lad," Mither said. "Nowt wrong wi a pie every nar an ageern - so long as tha as it wi gravy. Yon Pallid bloke sarnds a reet twonk. Tha can't live baht meat n gravy! That's just plain daft. Ow can this prannock not like a steak pie wi mushy peys an gravy in a dish? Eeh! Sethee! Ah's gerrin th'unger pangs nah! Scuse me luv - just off tert chippy. Back later!"

Simon Pallid declined further comment, as he felt he'd already said what really needed to be said, and that he had nothing to add.

The twat.

More as we get it.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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