Written by P.M. Wortham
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Wednesday, 18 January 2012

image for Lohan Crashes Weinstein Party with Centerfold Invitation
The camera lens wasn't big enough to capture Lohan's top half.

Without a Golden Globe invitation or her name appearing on any guest list, Lindsay Lohan brought her buxom luggage stuffed neatly into a tailored Prada dress, as she crashed the Weinstein Company After Party.

Reportedly handing the party's receptionist, who happened to be a 24 year old virgin names Karl, an invitation made from a folded Playboy cover, Lohan was allowed immediate entry with a smile and a chubby.

Apart from cozying up to a few Weinstein party guests, Lohan reportedly behaved herself, pretended to be a relevant Hollywood player with questionable talent, and played the part of a Kardashian pretty well.

She reportedly was forced to behaved herself. Ms. Lohan is scheduled for another court appearance in the coming weeks to update the judge on her completed community service and new humanistic attitude towards those she refers to as, "those other people who aren't Hollywood stars".

Karl Spackler, the aforementioned front door bouncer / receptionist seems to be on the fence about Lohan's sincerity, "I wasn't going to let her make a scene, it was easier just to let her in, but once I lifted the velvet rope she nearly knocked me over to get through". Spackler added, "It was a nice picture though and I guess I didn't mind getting bumped".

Karen Feiding, assistant to Harvey Weinstein also chose not to eject the downtrodden Ms. Lohan from the party. "She does fill out a dress quite nicely and the boys here don't seem to mind", says Feiding. "I can however, see a reality TV show in her future".

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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