Written by Aspartame Boy
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Wednesday, 28 December 2011

image for Puffington Host floats into the stratosphere: naked
The ascent was documented via this mobile WHYME video team

New York - The staid Puffington Host, purveyor of light gastronomic drivel, has finally floated up into the stratosphere following publication of its latest collection of puff pastry recipes in its Home and Garden section.

The recipes called for aspartame, Olestra, and sawdust, along with fake egg whites, whipped with a heavy duty mixer with the special Puffing-Ton attachment, used by the the over-exerted obese wherever fine chocolate is consumed.

As the naked ladies slowly ascended up in the air, several men stared up at them, leering and pointing. Mrs. Puffington drifted skyward, her skirt flapping in the wind upon a flag pole on which it had become snagged; she was interrogated regarding the puffiness of her pastry pieces by this reporter, wearing a jet-pack.

Read that interview in our upcoming magazine section, along with a special commentary by Katarina Frogpond2, source of many of the recipes.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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