Written by Abel Rodriguez
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Monday, 7 November 2011

image for Justin Bieber Accused of Being A "Baby Daddy" Takes The Rochard Test And Passes It With Flying Colors
The Rochard Test has proved that Justin Bieber is not the baby daddy of Marietta Yullyfiggle's baby.

NEW YORK CITY - Justin Bieber and his girlfriend Selena Gomez have both returned back to the U.S. after appearing on The 2011 MTV Europe Music Awards Show which was held in Belfast, Ireland.

Justin spoke with Vodka Vermicelli of iRumors and told her, that in the interest of proving once and for all that he is not the father of Marietta Yullyfiggle's baby Trickster Aloysius Justice Yullyfiggle, that he had recently submitted to taking a Rochard Test.

Bieber told Miss Vermicelli that the test was conducted at the prestigious Sleepy Hollow Clinic in Westchester County which is 30 miles north of Manhattan.

The clinic's Chief of Staff Dr. Daxford H. Tipplemist personally conducted the Rochard Test which consisted of a collection of two dozen ink blots.

Dr. Tipplemist said that the ink blots were all designed to resemble ink blots of a baby nature, such as a baby rattle, a baby diaper, and a baby playpen.

When Justin was shown the first ink blot picture, which resembled a baby rattle, he immediately said that the ink blot looked like a microphone. The next ink blot picture looked very much like a baby crib and Justin said that it looked like a Soap Box Derby race car.

Dr. Tipplemist then showed him an ink blot that appeared to look like a baby pacifier. When he asked Justin to tell him what he saw Bieber started blushing.

The doctor asked him what was the matter. And Justin replied that the ink blot resembled a body part located on a woman.

Dr. Tipplemist was quite puzzled. He asked Bieber to name the part but Justin shook his head and remarked that he did not want to but did state that the body part began with the letter "N."

The doctor asked if the body part was the nose; Justin shook his head no.

He then asked if the body part was the neck and again Justin replied with a no answer.

Bieber told him that it was a more private body part.

"The navel?" The doctor asked curiously.

Justin grinned and he told the doctor that he was getting real close.

Dr. Tipplemist reached in his top desk drawer and he took out a gynecological manual that listed all of the female body parts. He quickly scanned all the names that began with the letter "N."

"Oh" He remarked. "The nipple!" Doctor Tipplemist told Justin that the ink blot to him looked like a woman's nipple.

Justin turned pink and nodded in the affirmative.

The doctor smiled. He shook his hand and assured him that he had passed the Rochard Test with flying colors.

SIDENOTE: Justin and Selena were so thrilled and relieved that they celebrated by going to one of their favorite restaurants The Enchanted Enchilada in Brooklyn and then afterwards they went to a local movie theater to see Puss In Boots.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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