Written by Abel Rodriguez
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Tuesday, 1 November 2011

image for Kim Kardashian Hits NBA Hubby Kris Humphries With A Technical Divorce After Only 72 Days of Marriage
Kim Kardashian reportedly paid for the divorce with her MasterCard.

LOS ANGELES - Divorce papers have been filed in Los Angeles County which will dissolve the marriage between Kimberly Noel Kardashian, 31, and Kris Humphries, 26.

The couple was married on August 20, just a mere 72 days before Kim filed for divorce on grounds of Irreconcilable Ipso Habeas Se Habla Facto, which is legalese for saying that Kim and Kris just did not see eye-to-eye which stems from the fact that Kris is 6-foot-9-inches tall and Kim is only 5-foot-2-inches short.

According to Pia Confetti with the El Lay Informer, Kim's sister Kourtney never did like Kris. She told Kim from the very beginning that she just did not like the fact that he was much too tall for her and that when she stood next to him she looked like one of the Munchkins from the Wizard of Oz.

When Kourtney was reminded that sister Khloe is married to Los Angeles Laker Lamar Odom who stands 6-foot-10-inches tall she smiled and replied, "Yeah but Lamar has a bad habit of slouching real bad so that brings him down to about 6-foot-2-inches tall which works out great since Khloe stands 5-foot-10-inches tall."

Hollywood Innuendo is reporting that the real reason why Kim had filed for divorce was because Kris has been getting unemployment benefits due to the NBA lockout and Kim's sisters and even her own mother felt that it was just way beneath them to have someone in the Kardashian family receive unemployment checks and food stamps.

Hollywood Vis-a-Vis meanwhile reported that Kim Kardashian is possibly thinking about getting back together with her ex-boyfriend Dallas Cowboy wide receiver Miles Austin who is only 6-foot-2-inches tall.

And Hollywood Hors D'oeuvres is going with the story that Kim simply detested being called Kim "Kougar" Kardashian because of the three initials KKK.

In a somewhat related story. Motion picture actor Jack Nicholson, who is regarded as the number one Los Angeles Laker fan has confirmed that he was in fact offered the Lakers head coach's job vacated by Phil Jackson but that he regrettably had to turn it down due to what Nicholson referred to as a very personal reason.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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