Written by Skoob1999
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Saturday, 29 October 2011

image for Michael Jackson - Halloween Resurrection Eagerly Anticipated By Die-Hard Fans
It's Close To Midnight, And Something Evil's Lurking In The Dark

LOS ANGELES - Reports are filtering through that die-hard fans of the late King Of Propofol - Sorry, Pop - have been washing up in The City Of Angels, eagerly anticipating a 'Thriller' like zombie resurrection of the singing, dancing, alleged kiddie fiddler.

LAPD have been inundated with calls and enquiries from Wacko fans, who are keen to attend an all night Halloween vigil at the singer's graveside, in the belief that he will come back to life, rise from the earth, screech a bit, grab his bollocks and call for Chamone.

Crazy.

LAPD spokesman, Detective First Grade, Blitz Taser said that the Jackson fans must be crazy if they actually believe that the moonwalking freak is to emerge Jesus-like from the grave in some moment of divine revelation, before ascending to heaven.

"That ain't gonna happen," Detective Taser stated with some confidence. "That guy is pushing up the daisies, and that's where he's gonna stay."

Civil Rights.

LAPD's attitude drew strong criticism from civil rights activist, Al Sharkton, who said:

"It ain't up to LAPD to choose who does and doesn't qualify for resurrection. Who are they to judge? They're going way beyond their mandate here. This isn't within their remit. If Mister Jackson wants to come back to life and shake his booty, he should be allowed to do so unhindered. Damn cops should have better things to occupy their time - like beating innocent black people half to death in parking lots."

Opinion Poll

In a survey conducted by SEN, 97% of Jackson devotees seriously believe that Michael will rise from the grave on Halloween, 63% believe that he will re-enact the Thriller video, 27% believe that he'll appear with his hand down a little boy's trousers, and 4% believe his first act as a born again corpse will be to head straight for the LA zoo, and attempt to screw a chimpanzee.

eBay

Experts say that 'The Shroud Of Michael Jackson' being offered for auction on eBay is a fake. The shroud, a white cotton sheet, is said to contain a ghastly (Ghostly - Ed) image of the singer's body.

"They lifted the idea from the Shroud Of Turin," an expert said yesterday. "But it's just a hoax."

More as we get it.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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