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Saturday, 22 October 2011

image for X-Factor's Johnny Robinson Blows Gays And Straights Away In Rock Week
All Together Now - Touching Mee-ee--ee - Touching Yew-oo-oo!

LONDON - Gay novelty X-Factor contestant Johnny Robinson went into Saturday's performance feeling decidedly pessimistic, as the show was rock themed, and Johnny by his own admission, had never attempted to sing a rock song in his life.

Suffice to say that Johnny blew the 97% gay nation away with a rousing rendition of The Darkness's 'I Believe In A Thing Called Love' - surprising even himself!

In a performance anticipated as being 'a bit of a joke' - Johnny Robinson slaughtered the studio audience and the TV viewing public, as he commandeered the stage with a strutting and confident performance that a young Michael Jagger would have been quite justifiably proud of.

Gay satirist, Martin Shuttlecock, described Johnny's performance as "superbly executed, and a masterclass in the art of rock music."

Fellow gay satirists, and even a couple of straight ones were scrambling to take part in the phone vote to ensure that Johnny stays on the show.

Shuttlecock was apologetic for mentioning X-Factor, but explained that he was overcome with excitement by Johnny's performance.

"The way Johnny strutted his funky stuff up there on the stage..." Shuttlecock remarked. "Anyone would have thought he had a live gerbil stuck up his arse. Or something. And that.!"

More as we get it.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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