Written by Jean Le Fete
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Wednesday, 5 October 2011

image for Ellie James Sued By Artois Armond Gordon Over Envelope of Urine Critique
Artois in his youth, circa unknown

London - British Rocker/Rapper/and unknown other genres man Artois Armond Gordon is up in arms over a recent review and dismissal of his self proclaimed classic Envelope of Urine.

Writer for The Spoof, Ellie James, reviewed Envelope of Urine for $40.00 cash after unceremoniously being pulled in to listen to CD in the closet of the Classic Comics Hobby store in downtown Austin.

Electric Pineapple's remake of Envelope of Urine, with a play time of 4.59 minutes, appeared to leave Ms. James in tears. Later she said it was a severe form of torture, "Some songs just don't deserve to be remade," she said, "I've heard alley cats with better voices."

"Exactly why she's getting sued man, deprivation of character! That's what it is," said Artois via Skype, his nose showing off acne to the world. I tried to be diplomatic and sen a letter."

We obtained said letter:


Ms James,

Envelope of Urine is a Classic! Electric Pineapple is a classic! My guitar play is a classic! My voice made the Doormats who they were!....a.....aaaa...a band! I never been to a Latin Mass, I'm no even Catholic! David Clarke is a scum, he is not even human! He is a sub-scum! Something I find between my teeth! Me and me band flew all the way to Austing to play and then were told no, you no play, you no play! They say is not dead cat time. What does this mean? Envelope of Urine got flushed before Electric Pineapple get a chance to play!

A. Armond Gordon


"They replied they stood by their review, well I don't see nobody standing by! They's over there in Texas. Well my Barrister is going to have a field day with this!

Lawyers for Ms James say they will vigorously fight the lawsuit and file a counter-suit if necessary and a three piece suit and possibly a jumpsuit.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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