Written by Terry Firmer
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Thursday, 29 September 2011

image for Carolgees Doesn't Exist Says New Study
Professor Plum was shocked. Like this guy.

Boffins at Macclesfield University have made a startling discovery that the Surprise, Surprise sidekick Bob Carolgees is figment of Mankind's imagination.

The shocking discovery follows a 12 year investigation by the top academic institution which concluded that 'no one actually recalls having met the man or Spit the Dog. We believe he was computer generated' said Professor Peter Plum, the 'boffin' behind it.

Fans of Carolgees have begun a vigil outside what was once claimed to be his candle shop in Frodsham, Cheshire. The site is in fact a branch of 'Lidl'.

Bob Carolgees was named Royal Variety's Man of the Year in 1986 but never claimed the award. This is now expected to go to either Syd Little or the guy who played Mehmet Osman in Eastenders.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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