Written by jd Balderdash
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Topics: Attorneys

Wednesday, 4 January 2006

image for Startling new JFK Book claims: Jackie slept with Marilyn too
Home wrecker or Party Girl? Marilyn as a tot

As former President Reagan would say, "Well .. that changes everything." And everything it does if Stu Dillon's new book, "JFK, the Untold Untold Story" is allowed to be published. Attorneys for the estate of Norma Jeane Mortenson, aka Marilyn Monroe have filed a "Cease or we'll Sue" injunction against the book's author. One Attorney said,

"Mz Monroe was NOT gay. Or bi. Any insinuations otherwise will result in a hefty cash settlement for not only our legal firm but the estate of Mz Monroe as well."

According to the book's author, Jackie Kennedy was fully aware of her husband's affair with Monroe. Speaking with reporters he said,

"On more than one occasion Monroe would leave the president's bedroom then meet Jackie at some cheap motel over on the east side of the Potomac."

"I didn't make this up" Dillon said. "I interviewed over a dozen former White House aides from the Kennedy era who for a nominal fee copiously spilled their guts".

John F Kennedy, dog #3 of the hit song, "Who Let the Dogs Out" romanced, according to the book, dozens of other stars, starlets, singers, waitresses, anything with a dress and/or a pulse. Surprisingly no members of the Kennedy family are raising objections to the publication of the controversial book. Senator Ted Kennedy was unavailable for comment, himself garnishing 2 whole chapters in the book.

Katie O'Connell, granddaughter of Alfred Hitchcock says that even though her grandfather despised Marilyn Monroe, as far as she knows Monroe was not a lez.

"Although" she said, "Marilyn's relationship with Janet Lee DID seem a bit .. too friendly".

In a final statement to the press, perhaps as teaser to hype the hype, Stu Dillon said,

"In chapter 9 of my new book does Vice President Lyndon Johnson catch JFK, Marilyn Monroe AND Mrs Kennedy in a .. compromising situation? Buy my book and discover the sordid details!"

Analysts agree that attorneys for the estate of Marilyn Monroe will NOT be able to stop the publication of

JFK, the Untold Untold Story".

"Unless" said one attorney, "Unless the book tosses young John F Kennedy Junior into the middle of the fray THEN .. then we've got em."

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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