Written by Gail Farrelly

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Friday, 16 September 2011

image for The Seven Year Itch Dress Infested with Bedbugs!
Evicted! From Marilyn Monroe's dress.

Uh-oh. Perhaps the 'lucky' person who bought the dress for several million bucks wasn't so lucky after all. Little did the avid fan know that some little extras were included with Marilyn Monroe's iconic white dress from the movie, "The Seven Year Itch." Some creepy, crawly little extras. Yuck!

The new owner of the dress was in shock and could only say, "No wonder they call it The Seven Year ITCH dress. I didn't take it literally. My bad."

Meanwhile an exterminator/cleaner has made the owner of the dress an intriguing offer. One that probably the owner can't refuse. He'll clean and fumigate the affected dress as well as the owner's mansion for free. In return, he gets to take possession of the evicted "itch" bugs.

He'll be selling each of the bugs on eBay in a little see-through box, shaped like a toy block, wrapped in white ribbon. On the top of the box he'll have the well-known picture of Marilyn Monroe standing on a NY subway grate, her Seven Year Itch dress blowing in the wind. The exterminator's contact info will appear on the bottom of the box. Around the side of the buggy box will be printed these words: "I survived The Seven Year Itch.

Lesson learned: Caveat emptor.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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