WASHINGTON, D.C. - Michelle Obama, the nation's First Lady, or First Mama, as her husband President Barack Obama calls her, is extremely upset at what she is calling unfounded findings regarding alleged allegations about a so-called illegal gift which she gave in 2009, to France's First Lady Carla Bruni-Sarkozy.
White House Press Secretary Cal Colfax expressed to members of the White House press corps that the whole situation is most probably simply a fabrication that was fabricated from the right.
Yippee-Ki-Yay Magazine's Buck Yazoo asked Colfax to clarify what exactly he meant by his statement 'from the right.'
Colfax shot Yazoo a look that some said looked like he was saying goodness gracious dude, everyone knows what the phrase 'from the right' means.
The press secretary patiently replied, "Mr. Yazoo, the phrase 'from the right' categorically implies someone, a male or female who is a member of the opposing party, or to make it perfectly clear, a GOPer.
"Okay, gotcha Faxy." Yazoo remarked scribbling down some notes.
Mr. Colfax went on to say that the whole thing is simply a misunderstanding and that he thinks the whole thing may end up being traced back to the Michele Bachmann Political Campaign Camp.
When asked what gave him that idea, Colfax smiled and replied that the whole thing just seems to have that cheap hair spray smell to it.
A representative from the U.S. Fish and Wildlife Service Agency, Coolidge "Minnow Man" McPyrenees explained that supposedly the buttons on the accordion which Mrs. Obama presented to Mrs. Bruni-Sarkozy were made from the toe nails of the Double Breasted Fuchsia Sap Sucking Yicky Bird which is only found on the Wisconsin side of Lake Michigan and has been on the endangered species list since early May of 1999.
White House legal council Bernardo "Pretzels" Weatherwine stated that it is his understanding that some DNA samples were taken from the keys on the accordion that was given to Mrs. Bruni-Sarkozy.
Weatherwine added that highly sanctioned and secretive tests were conducted on the DNA found on that specific accordion's keys and there was no matching DNA found between the keys and any of the 17 Double Breasted Fuchsia Sap Sucking Yicky Birds that were randomly tested by the highly reputable independent DNA gathering Montana firm known as DNA Is Us.
Reports coming out the White House state that President Obama is extremely upset and is contemplating having Weatherwine file unfounded charges known by their legal Latin term as Ipso Nipso Delicto Pinata Fibso, against the Michele Bachmann Political Campaign where the rumors were believed to have originated.
To view about two dozen photographs of the accordion which Mrs. Obama gave to Mrs. Bruni-Sarkozy along with half a dozen nude photos of Carla you can go to www.carlasaccordionandstuff.hot