The strange marks on Peaches Geldof's arm are in the language of Amazonian tribesmen who hate Mondays.
Peaches knew when she met them that her Dad's one and only hit should be commemorated on her arm.
Peaches is known to be ripe for the picking and would love to have cream sloshed all over her in a bid to make an impact on the World Showbiz scene. I shall be at her side to help with this exciting venture and reporting to you on my discoveries.
As the showbiz critic is currently working on a Libyan showbiz story I have been asked, at short notice, to cover for her. This extraordinary Peaches story has fallen into my lap.
I only hope Blackberry will be pleased when she gets back.