Written by Lady Godiva
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Monday, 18 July 2011

image for British 'welly boot' manufacturer importing 'wellies' from Europe preparing for record downpours
Wellies they are wonderful. Wellies they are swell......as long as you HAVE a pair

'Rubber Boots R Us' has completely sold out of wellington boots, affectionately referred to by many as 'wellies'.

CEO of the largest Rubber Boot company in England, Willy 'Wellie' Gumshoe, tells of employees working 24/7 shipping 'wellies' from warehouses across Britain to retailers. Now those warehouses are completely empty as are the shops they shipped to.

Mr. Gumshoe has contacted various rubber boot manufacturers in Europe and is importing many thousands of pairs of wellies, all sizes, colours and designs. It is hoped that they arrive in his warehouses within two days as the weather forecast isn't looking too clever.

People accept that they will have to pay around 'double' for the imported wellies, than they would normally pay but are willing to do so in order to stay dry.

Most Brits were thought to own at least one pair of wellies each but many turned out to have disintergrated in various areas, leaving holes. This appears to be a result of them sitting in attics and sheds too long. Others just didn't fit.

Welly exchanges have been set up in Community Centres in many towns, where people can deposit the wellies their children have outgrown and, hopefully, pick up a pair that fit.

The one family said NOT to be affected by the wellie shortage is The British Royal Family.

Apparently they employ a welly maker and he makes sure that there are dozen of green wellies available for all members of The Royal family at all times.

Unfortunately, HRH Queen Elizabeth refuses to share these wellies with her 'subjects'.

"Let them wear waders!" she is reported to have snorted.


Nice one Liz! May all YOUR wellies get holes in them.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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