Written by Skoob1999

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Topics: Vampires, Milk, blood, dairy

Wednesday, 18 May 2011

image for Vampire Dairies Shut Down - Lobov And Winkelholder Devastated
Red Vampire Milk - Bad Idea

Hereford based dairy produce manufacturers, Vampire Dairies, have been shut down by their co-owners, Nina Lobov and Damian Winkelholder, following a dramatic downturn in turnover.

"It was regrettable, but we had to take drastic action," Winkelholder said. "We were losing money hand over fist. We had no alternative."

Initial reports suggest that 27 full time employees will be made redundant, and that the plant will be offered to let. Observers suggest that when the 'To Let' sign goes up, some nine year old wag will scrawl a letter I on it in marker pen, so that it reads 'ToILet.'

Nina Lobov lamented:

"I can only guess that we overestimated the underwhelming response to blood red dairy products. It seems that blood red milk, cheese and yoghurt doesn't really have a great deal of mass appeal. I guess you could say that we misinterpreted the market."

More as we get it.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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