Written by Skoob1999
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Topics: Socks, cheese

Sunday, 6 March 2011

image for Parmesan Cheese Manufacturer Takes Out Patent On Sweaty Socks
Sock Scraping Cheese - Tastes Okay But Smells Like Shit!

Just in - Italian Parmesan cheese manufacturing market leader, 'Mister Whiffy' has launched an unprecedented patent pending bid for sweaty socks.

"We are protecting our interests inna de market" said Signor Kraft Dolcelatte of 'Mister Whiffy.'

It is thought that the Italian market leader intends to utilise every possible research and development opportunity in the field of Parmesan cheese, including research possibilities involving sweaty socks.

"We have learned through the markets," Signor Dolcelatte explained, "That aromatic Italian soft cheeses are very popular. As we may in future years be unable to meeta the demand for real Parmesan, we should investigate a the possibilities of a synthetic Parmesano - anda whatta better place to begin dan widda sweaty sock?"

It seems that 'Mister Whiffy' has done his research into 'Historico Parmegnano' and that the international interpretation of Parmesan is that, basically, it smells like sweaty socks.

Especially when warmed up.

The labs are currently investigating sweaty sock samples with a view to developing macrobiotic cultures, capable of being infused into goats milk in order to manufacture synthetic Parmesan.

"Itta helpa very much iffa de sock donor suffer fromma da foot of da athlete. Then we getta real crusty socks - we can work on the cultures and hopefully develop good product from cultures. Scusa me - I tink I gonna puke!"

More as we get it. Preferably with a nice cheddar. And a clean pair of socks.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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