Written by Neil Levine
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Topics: New York, business

Thursday, 17 November 2005

image for Victoria Gotti And Her Boys Are Going Into The Family Business
Meet The Gotti Family

Huntington and New York, New York---Today, it is not only possible to Grow Up Gotti, but also to Buy Gotti, Eat Gotti, Look Gotti and Live Gotti.


Because the Gotti boys are going into some family businesses. And unlike Kathy, Rick, Paris and Nicky Hilton, this time the boys, Victoria Gotti's handsome, hip and spoiled sons, John, Frankie and Carmine, all of Growing Up Gotti fame, really mean business.


No, not grandfather John's business - plumbing or the other familia business whatever that may or may not have been or even Uncle Junior's business or Great Uncle Peter's business or father Carmine Agnello's primary source of income, but the new with it businesses of tanning and food, lots of it, all Italian, all personally supervised, all the best, all for you all the time.


To begin, you now no longer have to worry about what to do with your body because Frankie, the youngest at 15 but with the charisma of the Dapper Don himself, is going to supervise whether you're going to be roasting toasting fresh and pampered just like the Gotti boys themselves or whether you're going to go beyond pale and miss a big chance to be cool and look relaxed by hiding away in his sun bed emporium, Gotti Tans, the new Huntington, Long Island business.


His brothers, Carmine and John, have come up with their own spin on the family business, Ciao Bella, named in honor of their gorgeous, sophisticated mother, Victoria, writer, media personality and chief capo of the Gotti boy's businesses. Mother Gotti has had to sign papers attesting to the fact that her boys are going to do what needs to be done when it needs to be done to operate like a familia, once the local banks made them an offer they couldn't refute or do without.


Ciao Bella's logo features a picture of mama Victoria ("What A Dish!") and a menu specializing in what else, Italian food, with an emphasis on pasta and pizza, and a gourmet cook named Mossimo, pronounced "Ma I'm Home," imported directly from Italy of all places, running the show, and momma pulling strings behind the scenes and giving advice as only a mother can.


Few if any unhappy customers are expected since everything is going to be taken care of and fixed up fine ("Multa bene buono" or something like that).


There is no word on prices or hours, but rest assured these things can be corrected in a jiffy. Gotti souvenirs will, of course, be available, for a price.


Click on My Name near the top if you want to read more of my satires on subjects from Paris Hilton to George Bush to "Tom Cruise Still Battling."

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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