Written by anthonyrosania
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Monday, 13 December 2010

image for H&R Block Shares Plummet After One-Day Gain: The Dead Cat Has Bounced. And Landed Again.

For a (very) short while, following H&R Block's "Everything is rosy" quarterly earnings report last week, H&R Block's stock actually shot up near its 52-week high.

Thespoof Welcomes H&R Block Back To Our Family Of Advertisers!
Read more about their Emerald Advance in Emerald Advance For Christmas? Jesus Wants You To! and H&R Block Emerald Advance: Predatory? No. Delicious? Yes!

Reversal of fortune, or dead cat bounce? We pick the latter.

H&R Block (NASD HRB: 0.000000024) is frought with issues:

1. The tax return juggernaut prepared fewer returns last year, losing out on a fantastic opportunity to grab away early-season filers abandoned national competitors because their refund anticipation loan supplier bailed out, and Block still couldn't gain market share.

2. Block also continues to take it in the pooper --sideways-- from a mortgage business it entered with head-up-ass, and exited with tail between legs.

3. Block's in-house law firm, Swindle and Shyster, has been plenty busy defending lawsuits over various business practices some have called unsavory.

4. Oh, and Russ Smythe, the CEO brought in to turn the mess around in 2007 decided he'd had enough and got the f--k out of Dodge. And why would someone quit being the CEO of a multi-billion dollar international corporation to work at 'The Havi Group'? Because the multi-billion dollar international corporation is H&R F--king Block.

"I laugh at people who point to HRB's 1.22% growth in the past week as an indicator of a trend-reversal," said thespoof.com's Senior H&R Block analyst Anthony Rosania. "That same stock is down 15.89% since May, 2010, and over 40% year-to-date."

"$1000 invested in HRB stock on January 3, 2010 is now worth $592.62," he continued. "If you want to piss away $408 and have nothing to show for it, you should pay for my ex-wife's Nutri-System food for a month."

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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