For three consecutive years, H&R Block has filled the destitute and credit-retarded that they will have a merry Christmas via their Emerald Advance loans, only to dash said hope with denials in the 70%-90% range.
Fortunately for some, the blogging universe is chock-a-block with said stories, warning many to stay away from this scammish credit product and its usury-level interest rate.
"Just a little FYI to let you know how bad it really is out there," said 'Anonymous Coward' on a holiday loans blog. "The lady that did our application said she was hating her job cause hardly anyone is getting approved and folks are getting PO'ed when they don't get their money."
"Why the hell would you get a loan from these a--holes to pay for Jesus's birthday," says 'BlockistheDevil'. "Do you really think Jesus would want you to do this?"
"We admit that we are having some problems getting people approved for Emerald Advance early this season," said H&R Block CEO Alan Bennett, who was filing his unemployment claim online while being interviewed. "But everyone who comes in is a f--king deadbeat."
"It is not like we are tricking people," he continued. "We simply promise them a loan for Christmas, get them to come in and 'Jump Start' their tax return, and then deny their loan application."
"Then, we hold their tax documents hostage so that they have to come back to us to get their return done. What could possibly be unethical about... Wait."