Written by anthonyrosania
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Saturday, 13 November 2010

image for Fat Alcoholics Rejoice: Alcohol-Infused Whipped Cream Hits Shelves Today

It's a bandwidth issue, really: You want to be able to jam as much heart-choking fattening deserts as possible, but your mouth is where the alcohol goes into!

How can one destroy his or her liver while eating desserts and sh-t? With Whipped Lightning, the world's first alcohol-infused whipped cream.

According their website, Whipped Lightning is, "A tasty topping that can dress up any drink. Try it on shots & shooters, cocktails, martinis, coffees, or frozen beverages as well as spicing up sex with fat chicks who are still at the bar at 1:59:50AM."

Unfortunately, no one knows how many calories are in a service of Whipped Lightning: "We've never had Whipped Lightning tested to determine how many calories are in a serving," continued the website. "Whipahol is not a food product and is not subject to FDA labeling requirements; it is an alcoholic beverage, so bottoms-up, Porky."

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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