Written by P.M. Wortham
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Topics: Yahoo, Merger, AOL

Thursday, 14 October 2010

image for Yahoo to Fight AOL Based on Name Change Alone
Common investors in white socks and black shoes not thrilled about the name change

Nobody on Wall Street was surprised to learn of the takeover attempt by AOL over Yahoo, but a fight seems to be brewing over the proposed name for the combined companies.

Industry insiders say that the friction created by the poorly chosen name had more to do with the investment law firm leading the merger efforts than anything else. Apparently chosen by AOL for their lower overall cost of services and also to support AOL's commitment for diversity in business partnerships, the openly gay and lesbian law firm of Dewey, Powndem and Haarde will be managing the negotiations.

Law representative Harold Palms of DP&H told reporters, "I'm not sure what all the fuss is about, it was just a name proposal. AOL can obviously choose whatever name it prefers. But, I kind of like it actually. 'YaHaol'. It sort of rolls off the tongue nicely". Yahoo assistant vice president, Rory Deerslayer has a different take. "If you're going to buy us out, get it over with and call it AOL. I mean, like they don't expect to be the laughing stock of Wall Street with a name that sounds like Your Hole?" Palms responded by saying, "Yahoo has better name recognition these days. We can't get rid of the entire brand".

Negotiations continue and the final name of the company has yet to be determined, though one insider to the negotiations claims to have seen the NASDAQ forms with the actual ticker symbol. Unless changed before submission to the Security and Exchange Commission and NASDAQ, the market trading symbol is set to be YAHOL.

Analysts expect opening investors into this stock to be in and out, with price fluctuations up and down, but long term investments should be deep in YAHOL.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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