Billions of pounds of supposedly lost taxpayers' money has been found under the bed of a child in Stoke-on-Trent.
The money, almost £158billion, was discovered by a woman hoovering her son's bedroom on Sunday morning.
Britain, like most of the rest of the world, has been plunged into the mirky depths of an economic recession by years of irresponsible lending by financial institutions, and a catastrophic succession of poor governmental fiscal policies, resulting in a huge debt that the country had been going to find it difficult to repay.
Imagine the surprise and delight, then, of mum Karen Low-Cal, who made the amazing discovery underneath the bed of her son, Child C. She told us:
"I honestly don't know where he got it from! I suppose I could have kept my mouth shut and spent it, but I knew it didn't belong to us, so I rang the Chancellor and told him to send someone around for it."
Karen was fuming today though. She told me:
"They're a right shower! It's been three days, and it's still sat there!"