Written by j.w.
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Sunday, 29 August 2010

image for James Murdoch's Brave Decision
A Clarkson Chase for the new programme

BSkyB's Chairman, James Murdoch, son of Rupert (fondly known as The Bear), has made a brave decision which will rock the Television World.

Rising to the challenge from Sir Mark Thompson, the BBC director-general to make homegrown drama programmes, Murdoch has bought the casts of 'Last of the Summer Wine', which is finishing its schedule with the BBC and joining it to the cast of 'The Bill', the much loved ITV series now being annhilated.

Working titles for the new show, going onto our screens three times a week at peak times shortly, have been 'The Summer Bill', 'Last Bill' and 'Lasting for ever bill'. But current favourite is 'The Whining Summer Bill'.

The new series will combine the old BBC charm of the rustic pensioners with the tough, hard hitting impact of the Police drama. Plans are already in place to have Russ Abbot as the leading character as a former Chief Inspector. He will routinely have a few laughs with his pals about the old lags they have locked up over the years. Exciting flashbacks to illustrate their amusing anecdotes will enliven proceedings and bring them to life.

Set in the Somerset hills with chases along rural lanes ghosted by Jeremy Clarkson (another recruit from the BBC who is known to be disgusted with his former homosexual Communist masters) the drama will burst onto our screens early in 2011.

TV critic Jocelyn Hard exclaimed: 'How absolutely spiffing! Thank God for the Murdoch initiative. Quite sublime. The gentle humour married to the strong masculine beef will make an unforgettable marriage. Fantastic synchronity with our Coalition Government's beautiful betrothal!'

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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