Written by Jimbo123
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Topics: Economy, mortgage

Wednesday, 16 June 2010

image for Bank of England to cap mortgages
"Can you solve the banking crisis Daisy?"

When going to the polls voters always dream, as new labour put it, - "things can only get better" but then this is the method by which everything is 'packaged' these days. How gulliable are we?

Just bought your car insurance? - Oh dear, you could of saved £150. Just changed gas supplier? - so sad - you could of saved £xxx - if you were in the lucky 51% that is.

And so the government today is going to tell mortgage lenders - "No more 125% mortgages - you are very naughty bankers, don't do it again." - and 'hey presto' the credit crunch is behind us.

Eh no actually, for an embarrassing number of reasons you would expect the average Oxford graduate to pick up on.

1. All the 100% lenders are bust or state owned, and taxpayers don't want to see the government 'advising itself' anymore.

2. The credit crunch wasn't about UK mortgages - it was the USA ones stupid. Northern Rock mortgages were dodgy but not 'back of the envelope' like in america. They would of survived had the short term funding not stopped.

3. The government should be less worried about the £2-3B being lent out each month amd more worried about the £1400B still outstanding about a quarter of which has already been lent on the terms it doesn't like - no proof of income, interest-only or no deposit. Horse bolted already I'm afraid.

In any case, the remaining lenders are currently as likely to lend at 100%+ as god is to play golf with the earth. The Manchester Weirdos Building Society is the only lender to go to 95% provided you are happy that your parents 'go missing' for one year.

So this is a shameful and empty soundbite a la 'new labour' - like saying "I promise my dog won't be crapping on your lawn in a year's time....but my cow might be."

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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