Written by Gail Farrelly
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Topics: Wall Street, Bees

Tuesday, 1 June 2010

image for Bees Descend on Wall Street, Get the Boot
She and her pals were just house hunting.

A swarm of about 15,000 bees descended on Wall Street yesterday, startling New York natives and visitors alike. A New York Police Department officer, a bee expert, came to the rescue, "vacuumed" up the bees and packed them in a screened pen to be transported to a beehive in Connecticut.

Before the eviction, Spoof reporter Gail Farrelly managed to interview Queen Bee Beatrice and get the real buzz. Dusting herself off and adjusting her tiara, Beatrice shrugged and said none of the bees could understand the complete panic at the sight of a few bees. She commented, "There's already tons of insects on Wall Street, many of them of the human variety. So why should a few more insects create such a big problem?"

Beatrice also reported that she and her subjects had no plans to attack; they were simply house hunting. They had lost their hive in the NY suburbs to foreclosure and were looking for a new one. "Sadly, we're just like everybody else in this economy," she added.

But then Beatrice smiled broadly and had a parting comment. "It all worked out according to plan. We're going to a nice new home and have incurred no moving expenses. No moving expenses at all. How's that for a deal?" Beatrice then whispered that she had gotten the idea from reading Donald Trumps's book (written with Tony Schwartz), The Art of the Deal.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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