Written by Clapton is God
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Friday, 23 April 2010

image for Store Wars - Episode Two - Attack of the Chaka

The Supermarket Chain, ASDA has successfully been taken over by the formerly mysterious consortium, CNN News can now reveal who the mystery Shareholder is

Legendary Disco Diva and all round Bodacious Babe, Chaka Khan has purchased 64% of the shares of the former Wal Mart Chain. The Other Shareholders were delighted at this news.

Miss Khans Agent, Benjamin Yiddletownface, had this statement this morning.

"Miss Khan's first new policies is to revamp the Tin Shed they call the Tipton Banch, lower petrol prices and cut tax on anything pizza related."

A spokesman from Tesco said it was a "fad" and that she would never make a go of it.

However support came in from Sir Elton John, Neil Sedaka and The Ghost of Karen Carpenter.

Peter Sissons Signing Off

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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