New Yorkers got a shock today when they were treated to the sight of hundreds of Amazon kindles staging a protest in Penn Station. The electronic readers were angry with the talk of the possibility of increases in the prices of eBooks. They fear their future is in jeopardy.
Rita eReader, the chief kindle, held a brief news conference at the site of the protest to explain what was at stake. She said that if people can no longer afford to buy ebooks, then there will be no need for the services of kindles. "But it's not only a question of jobs for us," she said, "it's also the issue of literacy for every person on the planet." She then led the kindles on a protest march through the train station. As they marched, the kindles entertained onlookers with a number of chants aimed at publishers. Here are two of the chants: 1) Don't be schnooks, and overprice the books; 2) People want to read, forget about your greed.
At least one observer was impressed. "Hey, I didn't know they could talk," said a twentysomething female, enchanted by the plucky little kindles. "Of course, they have that text-to-speech thing, you know," her boyfriend said. "I simply must have one," the woman squealed, pointing at the pack of kindles and adding, "look at their cute little legs." Her boyfriend then quickly grabbed her hand and led her away from the demonstration. "No more drinks for you," he said firmly. "Besides, we have a train to catch."