Cambridge, MA - M.I.T. economists are perplexed over a largely wider trade gap in September. According to calculations run on the data, as reported by Norance Hornaby of East Campus, Americans must be producing much less and buying much more.
"I can't understand it," quipped Norance, sucking on a number 4 pencil. "We already shipped all US jobs to Mexico, Vietnam, China, India, Brazil, Turkey, Africa, and Australia. We screwed the banks like crazy, so there is no money in the United States anymore. The Bilderbergers took it all back. So where is the trade gap coming from?"
I reminded him about all the sloppy work that Americans are prone to do, then it came to both of us. In a rare moment in history, a reporter made the story. I suggested that perhaps the trade deficit increase was due to defective products being sent back to the United States.
After a few quick calculations, Norance confirmed it. The increase was due entirely to defective products being returned to the United States.