One of the country's high street banks is getting into the festive swing with a special Halloween promotion.
Royal and Midland Bank of NatLand will celebrate the recently adopted Transatlantic tradition of blackmail and extortion, better known as 'Trick or Treat', with a customer friendly public relations pitch aimed specifically at emptying the public's purse with a cheeky smile, a grin and a generous dollop of gore.
Vlad Arkwright, RMBN's Customer Relations Officer, told TheSpoof.com, "Here at the Royal and MBN we believe in giving the customer exactly what they deserve, and what they deserve is a gold plated current account that will protect their day to day banking transactions with 0% interest rates, guaranteed overdraft refusals and monthly charges that will bring a tear to their pathetic eyes."
When these shameless, arbitrary proposals were questioned by our reporter, Count Mr Arkwright replied. "If you can't bleed your customers dry at Halloween, when the hell can you?"